Watching our children grow

There is great joy in watching your children grow up. To be sure, there are always bumps in the road but God blessed us with the chance to watch children grow and mature over time that is wonderful to behold. Some parents go overboard on involvement - sometimes called 'helicopter parents'. They don't leave enough breathing room for their children to learn to do their own thing. (An interesting article in the 11-30-09 Time Magazine on the backlash to 'over-parenting.)

And that joy of being a parent continues well into adulthood. Parents never stop being parents.

The new media makes that 'watching' different than it used to be. Time was, you didn't know some things that your children were doing - even as the hovering, helicopter parent. As they got older and spread their wings, they lived more and more of life outside of our immediate sphere of influence.

Now you have a choice. Young people these days, for better or worse, post so much of their life on line... for everyone to see... including you, if you choose. Choosing to watch can add to the joy of parenting as you see into their lives in a more immediate way than was possible in the past. It can also let you see things you wish you didn't see. And then you have to decide how to respond... chime in with a response to their posts or stay silent.

A hard call. Sometimes it is good to chime in, like you would if they had told you (they kind of did when they posted it!) and you were giving advice, sharing your perspective and counsel. (The thing to remember about advice is that it is best received when it is wanted, and inside a mutually respected relationship.) Sometimes it is good to bite your tongue and stay a silent observer - and use the info as a way to pray very specifically! Chime in as a parent when you aren't wanted and the posts may stop. I think I'd rather know than not. If you can't take the good with the bad you are better off not watching at all, and then you'll miss it all. Ah, the joys of parenting! Kind of like our heavenly Father, watching us.